"And then he’ll try again, and he’ll always be like, ‘Get on top,’ even though the sex is miserable and takes like literally 40 minutes, and even though he’s barely hard he’s asked you twice if he can put it in your ass and the sun rises and is glaring through the shitty Venetian blinds and you’re crashing off the drugs and exhausted from gyrating for so long and his roommate the New Jersey Net is getting up to use the bathroom and you’re totally sore, and it’s around this time you just wonder in this sensitive, horrible way if it’s possible for the world to be any uglier."